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This Month’s Letter

Dear KRS,
My husband and I both work long, hard days and when we get home we are drained.  We eat, watch some television and go to bed.  What conversation there is mostly revolves around household business.  We'd both like to exercise more which would probably give us more energy but then we'd spend even more time apart.  We made a conscious choice not to have children so we could be together and have the freedom to do what we want when we want.  That's not happening and I don't like where we're heading.
Drained Couple

Dear Drained Couple,
No surprises here.  Drained at the end of the day = drained, flat communication and potential drained, flat relationship.  For starters, how about setting a once a week "date" to exercise together?  If possible, make it on the weekend and be specific about the time and activity.  Walk or bike around town - or drive to a part of town (or the country) that is conducive to the activity.  I particularly like walking or hiking as a couple activity because it also serves as a natural, non-threatening and inexpensive therapy session.  My private clients love it when we do talking/walking sessions.  Psychologists should try it.  Exercise opens the mind and heart and stimulates healthy communication that is actually enjoyable (versus sitting across from each other and saying "Okay, now it's our time to communicate...").  Believe it or not, exercise in the form of yard work or cleaning the garage together can also be a bonding experience if both approach it with the right frame of mind.  A mission with rewards that extend beyond a nice looking yard.

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